This probably deserves its own post sometime in the coming weeks, but are we really going to be getting three games a week from the Cuthburt/Suitor combo? Understand that we’re perfectly fine with Cuthburt, even if he did mis-identify numerous players last week, but isn’t this going to get very old rather quickly? Is there nobody else in the TSN cabal that is capable of calling games?

And shouldn’t they have some different guys on hand so that they can show up a few days before the game and talk to some of the players?

Hamilton at Toronto

Not a good first week for the Ti-Cats as the defence got carved up like a whole chicken placed in front of Rob Murphy. The main change for the Cats this week is that the coveted “yellow shoes” have been passed on to Tre Smith after the departure of Willie Pounder. This of course leads to the obvious question: who the hell is Willie Pounder?

Pick: Toronto

Calgary at Edmonton

Wow, that was a lot of bluster from Fred Perry last week without any payoff at all. Good to see that he’s on the same page as his coach. Perhaps the Stamps relatively inexperienced line will prove more palatable.

Pick: Calgary

Winnipeg at Montreal

Presumably this game will be a better indicator, but that was a heck of a start by the Als. The benefit of course of having Trestman succeed this year would be that it would mean that more owners might become more creative in their hiring, something that has been lacking since Greg Marshall was unfairly blamed for the disastrous Ti-Cat team of two years ago.

Pick: Montreal

Saskatchewan at BC

Odds that Wally gives us a nonsensical quote about the QB change: Off the board, it’s already happened (“Was I mistake on my part? I’m not saying it was a mistake or not. I’m not making two mistakes. If I don’t correct it, then I’m afraid to say maybe I didn’t make a good choice.”

Odds that Roy Shivers attacks Eric “The Hedgehog” Tillman with a toothpick: 5 to 1

Pick: BC

Bonus Pick:

All of the Argos have been injured in practice, leaving Pinball to play the Ti-Cats himself. Unfortunately, Pinball was taking part in a pre-game promotion that had him sitting in a go-kart, which the dastardly Ti-Cats have superglued him into. How does go-kart bound Pinball do?*

Boatmenblog Pick: Pinball 274 Ti-Cats 5. This proves to be Pinball’s biggest disadvantage yet. The go-kart severely hampers his ability to tackle and actually makes him slower. On the other hand, he’s playing the Ti-Cats.

* Everything we need to know about football analysis, we learned from early ‘90s SNL sketches.

Good on the Stamps for figuring out that the one key ingredient they were lacking last year was an ageing quarterback who can’t run nearly as well as he used to and bravo on getting Dave Dickenson to play the Danny Mac role. Some may argue that the presence of a QB as accomplished as Dickenson, even if he is getting on in years, may be detrimental to Hank Burris, but at this stage I think Henry is thankful to know that in four years from now when he’s being outrun by offensive linemen, he too can be the Stamps backup QB.

The other major offseason move was obviously the signing of a new head coach. Now Hufnagel will most likely be able to help the offence, but is that really the major problem for the Stamps? In terms of skill position players, they have enough talent that even Gary Etcheverry’s “run for two yards, run for one yard and hope the ref doesn’t know how to count” offence would probably be mildly successful, even if they are starting two linemen straight out of school.

The key here is obviously going to be the defense and what, if any, improvements they can make after a tumultuous year in 2007. Personnel wise, they haven’t really added much on that side of the ball, with the notable exception of JoJuan Armour. Admitedly though, he was only really effective in Hamilton when he was running on to the field at the start of games with a sledgehammer. So if this doesn’t work out, look for him to be in the running for Pigskin Pete duty.

It’s all about taking small steps though. At this time last year, Akili Smith was slotted in to play a key role and they had a coach that bore an uncanny resemblence to Judge Doom from Who Framed Roger Rabbit. Now if they’d only stop angering the football gods by running fake field goals in long decided games, maybe they’ll have something.

but thanks to the National Post for running our ramblings on the CFL

 

http://www.canada.com/topics/sports/baseball/story.html?id=c03907f4-8b9c-4614-9567-6b604c03fd12

We are not liveblogging tonight's exhibition game, but damn!  Seventy-six yard touchdown pass, Bishop to Bethel is certainly a good way to kick things off. 

Strike up the Argonotes!  Start planning the parade...  It's a guaranteed Grey Cup!

Consider this a pre-emptive strike.

While at the Jays game Friday night (at this point it would probably make more sense if I started renting a room at the RC hotel) the woman sitting behind me was giggling with delight after every Jays strike out. Now if she was just delirious about the Jays recent lights out starting pitching or was enjoying the mutton chopped stylings of Brian Tallet that’d be one thing. But no, like thousands of other occasional Toronto baseball fans she was giddy over the prospect of possibly getting a free crappy $2 pepperoni slice from Pizza Pizza.

“Wouldn’t it be great if they did this at every game in Toronto?”

Hell no! We’ve already seen this damn promotion ruin Jays and Raptors games and there is no way as fans that we should allow it to spread to other teams. There is little that is more embarrassing as a sports fan in this city than to have a top of the ninth situation in a close game and have the crowd chanting “Pizza! Pizza!”. I get it from Pizza Pizza’s perspective, it’s a great marketing trick, but why people are so enthralled by this (or the chance to win a shirt that says FedEx on it) is beyond me. If the Carolina Hurricanes had a promotion where everyone got some free ribs if the team scored 4 goals and the whole crowd starting chanting “B! B! Q!” in the third period, we’d all think they were brain dead hicks, so why do we stand for this in our own city? Incidentally, the Hurricanes example would actually be somewhat defensible on account of BBQ being awesome.

So, how does this relate to the Argos? Well, so far Pizza Pizza’s advertising at the games has been restricted to bringing out that guy who won the world pizza dough competition and having Damon Allen make incomprehensible jokes about Jude St. John being Italian. But we all know that it won’t stop there.

As we speak there is someone sitting in a big leather chair at Pizza Pizza headquarters plotting a way to get pizza chants going at all public places. Weddings, funerals, beer fests and yes, Argo games. It’s not a stretch to picture fair weather fans making too much noise when the Argos have the ball because one more first down will get them a soggy piece of cardboard with cheese on it. Or groaning after a third down stop because it didn’t get them the last sack needed for an angioplasty inducing slice, and the last thing this city needs is to have the rest of the country think that he have the dumbest fans in the league save for the gaggle of bandwagoners that show up for the Als game at the Big O every year.

So is there any sponsorship that Pizza Pizza can take on that would make us happier than seeing Timmy Chang coming into a game? Easy. Cheese Race! Cheese Race!

I'm sure this will just play into the whole "East Coast bias" feeling that some of the league's left coast supporters point to, but generally the Lions have been a completely forgettable foe over the last number of years.  Obviously they've had some great teams, but the only real reminder I get that they're in the league are the Wally Buono chloseterol ads.

The Lions have been effective at finding little known guys to play big roles, meaning you never notice any big free agent signings, they play the majority of their games at a time when I've usually gone out for the evening and unless they're in the Grey Cup or hosting it, you're liable to see 10 Lions fans all of Grey Cup week. 

Completely forgettable. 

Which is a shame because Wally is always good for a few hissy fits every year, you never know when one of the players is going to be tasered (you're safe now, TJ Acree) and they always play an interesting offensive style.  Maybe that should be my new season resolution. Pay more attention to the Lions.  Onwards to the offseason movement:

• While the big off-season question has been Jackson or Pierce, I'm guessing that this battle is already over. It's plain to see that Buck used his clout to make sure that he no longer had the most ridiculous name on the roster and I'm guessing he can't go to the well twice. Enter Rolly Lumbala.  Buck, Rolly... We're a "Nails" and a "Duke" away from a WWII platoon.
• Jason Jimenez appealed his one game suspension for breaking Anthony Gargiulo's leg last year and while this has probably been resolved, who cares? Jimenez and Rob Murphy will just find another way to get suspended in the exhibition game. Tim Cheatwood's apparently available again - I'm sure he'd fit in nicely with the "total asshole" theme the Lions have been gunning for.
• Seems that there is a possibility that Cam Wake could get out of his three year deal with the Lions allowing him the chance to explore his NFL options. As unsolicited advice: Go for it Cameron.  Don't turn into the next Joe Montford or Tim Cofield. (Actually, to avoid this you probably just need to avoid becoming a high profile addition to the Argos. But you get the point).

Finally, we were very pleased to see the Lions organization reach out and help the troubled BC forestry industry. Ensuring that the man who consumes nearly one third of all toothpicks produced in North America is in the province ensuring lower shipping costs will surely be appreciated and makes for great PR for the team. Welcome back, Roy. 

After taking a few months off to recharge our batteries and question a higher power that would allow the Riders to win a Grey Cup (we're only now over it), we're back and ready to continue our efforts to bring about the end of civilization.

As we start our third year of this endeavour, we promise that we will continue to search for the lighter side of the most enjoyable league in the country and that we will continue to have an unhealthy fascination with Pinball Clemons and stadium scoreboard races.

In the weeks leading up to the season, we will be rolling out of team previews to help you get caught up on all of the changes made in the offseson.  The departures of Kent Austin and Scott Coe, the re-emergence of Roy Shivers, the big Ronald Flemons trade.... wait a minute...
Is that a Matt Dunigan cooking show? 

It's going to be a good year.

OK, so despite the fact that the Argos failed to make it, we're very much looking forward to the festivities of Grey Cup week. But before we put the East final to bed, we have one last story to pass along.

After the game we were walking up John Street when two fans decided that they couldn't wait until they made it to their destination and started to relive themselves on the CBC building. Not too much notable there, Chris Walby probably does this every couple of weeks. However, just 20 feet away stood a gentlemen who was watching the scene unfold and shaking his head very slightly. His mouth slightly agape, his eyes projecting the look of a man who was watching the most horrific scene of his life play out...

So have a great time during Grey Cup week. Enjoy the city and the new friends you are sure to make.  Just don't take a piss on the CBC building.  Peter Mansbridge might not be able to handle it happening again.