We know the Argos don't have a home game this week, but indulge us a bit... Where the hell is the celebration car?  How do you lose a golf cart with a giant Argo helmet on it? 

Rusty's Picks:

Montreal at Edmonton:

During a moment of panic this week, Jim Popp signed QBs Sam Etcheverry, Mike Kerrigan, Marvin Graves and a spare refrigerator from his basement. The refrigerator was given an option for a second year.

Pick: Edmonton

Saskatchewan at Calgary:

If the Riders do the unthinkable and win the Grey Cup this year, will they expand the Kent Austin parking lot or name a tunnel after Eric "The Hedgehog" Tillman?  (Rider fans, consider yourself jinxed)

Pick: Calgary

Winnipeg at Hamilton:

Reasons why Richie Williams should start this week: 1) He's played well in relief the last two weeks and the 'Cats may as well see what they have. 2) He graduated from Appalachian State and everything they touch recently turns to gold. 3) You guessed it: His drunken fan club demands it.

Pick: Winnipeg

Toronto at BC:

So my sister has done the unthinkable and scheduled her wedding reception opposite this game. What is the etiquette here? Is a mini-tv acceptable? Help!

Pick: Toronto

A-Rad's Picks:

Montreal at Edmonton:

Danny Maciocia wants his players to take responsibility. Good call. And how better to do so than by following the coach's lead?

Step 1: While half the league's teams are missing their starting quarterbacks and/or running backs, blame injuries to a couple of your offensive linemen.

Step 2: Scapegoat a single player for all the team's ills.

Step 3: Absolve yourself of any (ahem) responsibility with quotes like the following: "It is not like we (the coaches) come in at halftime and take our stupid pills and then we take the field for the second half."

Maciocia!

Pick: Montreal

Saskatchewan at Calgary:

In case you don't think the Roughriders are inescapable in their province, here's a column comparing Roy Shivers to the Saskatchewan NDP. It's so obvious, I can't believe I didn't think of it.  

Pick: Calgary

Winnipeg at Hamilton:

I'm having a very hard time thinking of anything clever to say about the Ticats. But obviously not quite so tough a time as Perry Lefko, who came up with, uh, this. Although it does serve as yet another case (as if we needed another one) for bringing Scully back to end the Jason overkill. He was nothing if not distinctive...and not just for that really gross thing where he fired water out his ears.

Pick: Winnipeg

Toronto at BC:

According to Marty York's "sources," former TSN commentator Leif Pettersen is in line for the Argos' presidency. Last year, Marty had Glen Suitor as a candidate for commissioner. Look for Matt Dunigan to launch his bid for the Prime Minister's Office any day now. (This cries out for a Rod Black's balls joke, but I can't think of one. I must be more tired than I thought.)

Pick: Toronto

Bonus:

All of the Argos have been injured in practice, leaving Pinball to play the Lions by himself. Complicating matters is that Pinball is also expected to deliver a toast at Rusty's sister's wedding back in Toronto. How does Pinball do?*

Boatmenblog pick: Pinball 364, Lions 286. (Why such a close result? Always a little verbose, Pinball's two-and-a-half hour wedding speech, combined with hugging everyone attending, causes him to miss his flight - and in turn the entire first half. Luckily, Pinball against a full Lions team still scores at a faster rate than an entire Lions team against an empty field, so he reverses a 286-point half-time deficit with room to spare. )

* = Everything we need to know about football analysis, we learned from early '90s SNL sketches.